I HAVE THE POWER!

Somewhere along the line, while HE-MAN, the animated series/half-hour toy commercial was at its peak, some enterprising, self-proclaimed studio genius must have said, "Dolph Lundgren! He'd be a perfect He-Man!" The error lay, of course, in not realizing the differences between the two: one is a lifeless, two-dimensional caricature of masculinity; the other is a cartoon character.

So instead of a faithful adaption of the cartoon series, the producers offered this stripped-down rendition (scaled back, one would suppose, to accommodate the thespian abilities of its star). Lundgren -- blond, brawny and with a set of pecs that would give Dolly Parton pause -- plays the superhero locked in an eternal, epic battle with Skeletor, a power-crazed super villain played by scenery-shredding "superham" Frank Langella. They move through the story, such as it is, as statically as their counterparts in the afternoon kiddie cartoon.

Langella, (made up to look like Jack Palance with leprosy), aims to take over the planet Eternia, a war-torn paradise ruled by the Sorceress of Greyskull Castle ("St. Elsewhere's" Christina Pickles, wearing what appears to be a chandelier on her head), but her champion He-Man opposes him with his mighty sword. The titanic battle is brought to Earth when a brilliantly grating little troll (Billy Barty) magically transports them to Colby, Calif., via his Cosmic Key.

Actually they were headed for another planet, but a stray power bolt (or perhaps a chintzy producer) altered their orbit. Why build an out-of-this-world set when you can just go down to the mall and shoot off sparklers? So Earth waitress Courtney Cox and her boyfriend Robert Duncan Mitchell are drawn into the otherworldly warfare when they happen to find the key, mistaking it for some sort of Japanese stereo speaker.

Director Gary Goddard had previously created mythical kingdoms for Universal Studios -- "Kong on the Loose" and "Conan." And let's just say he hadn't quite made the leap from tourist traps to feature films. The actors are basically on their own -- either hamming it up behind a mask ( Langella), or nearly numb (Lundgren). It sounds as if the Scandinavian-born muscleman had been studying under Stallone's diction coach, but he has a sort-of-sweet, shining charisma, grinning and glistening, wearing thongs and things and accentuating his funkiness with plenty of grease. (It takes a lot of Wesson Oil to make a movie like Masters of the Universe.) Goddard later went on to direct the live action segments for the Terminator 3-D ride.

Over the years, Hollywood keeps threatening to remake He-Man or collect royalties from Showtime Beyond. Please do us a favor, stop! I rather see Mowgli and the Jungle Book come back to life.

Currently airing this month: Showtime Beyond

08/19/10 at 6:15 AM
08/19/10 at 5:00 PM
08/19/10 at 1:00 AM
08/30/10 at 2:45 PM
08/30/10 at 8:00 PM

This post was written by:
stan

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Check it, jive turkey!

Films like Shaft, Foxy Brown and Undercover Brother styled funkalicious jazzy soundtracks, tough black heroes and heroines and corrupt white cops and politicians. A new genre was born, both exploiting and celebrating black culture, targeting urban African-American audiences with its style and subject matter.

Today, some of the best of these films have become cult favorites, and have influenced new filmmakers such as Quentin Tarantino, whose Jackie Brown paid explicit homage to the genre he'd grown up on and loved. Shaft was recently remade in slick Hollywood style by John Singleton; but for the original low budget style and campy flair you had to go to the bargain dvd versions. Undercover Brother takes up where other blaxploitation spoofs left off and does so with reckless abandon and a no-holds barred style that moves fast with nonstop action, a little romance, and free-flowing jokes.

Created by Scott Sanders and Michael Jai White, Black Dynamite tells the story of a righteous brother, who's got martial art skills and knows just how to satisfy the ladies. What he can't do is what he promised his mother on her death bed: protect his brother from the drug gangs that are destroying the inner city. Upon hearing that his brother was killed, he swears revenge and sets out on a mission to discover those responsible. It turns out this was no simple task - his brother's assassination was part of a vast conspiracy to demoralize blacks by hitting them where it hurts the most, and the conspiracy goes all the way to the top: President Richard Nixon, who it turns out, has some sweet moves all his own.

The film is laugh out loud high-larious- talking all absurdness,raunchy and cool elements of traditional 70's blaxploitation films like Superfly and Dolemite, and tying them together into an absurdly funny epic revenge and save-the-world superman type shiat.

Part of the appeal is that the film mimics the on-the-fly imperfection of the old B-movie style Blaxploitation. Boom mikes occasionally appear in the shot, distracting the actor; obvious continuity problems (a woman whose tear of sadness appears and then disappears and reappears as the camera cuts back and forth between her and the actor; is suddenly replaced by a stand-in mid-scuffle, after he is obviously injured by a punch) add to the overall lightheartedness of the endeavor.

What shocked me, though, was that the film was not mocking blaxploitation, but rather paying homage. The filmmakers clearly loved every minute of it and so did I.

"Because whenever there's injustice, wrongs to be righted,innocents to be defended, Black Dynamite will be there, delivering ass-whuppings. and I will not hesitate to lay the hammer down on any clown that comes around."-Black Dynamite

This post was written by:
stan

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My love for the Man of Steel, literally

An intimate story.

Growing up, my childhood was dominated by the man himself, Superman. I idolized him in many ways that friends, family, and even the general public thought were unhealthy for a normal 8 year old. It started at an early age when my dad introduced me to Superman, the 1978 movie staring Marlon Brando, Gene Hackman, Christopher Reeve, and Margot Kidder.

Superman possesses extraordinary powers, traditionally described as "faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound". Who didn’t like that?

Although, many of my classmates during this time like Spiderman and Batman, I remained super-loyal to Superman. I had his super-cool “J” hair style, his steel-tin lunch box, and occasionally seen sporting a pair of tighty-whities of the “S” shield logo. And yes, I rock’d them quite well. ;)

I remembered an instance where my lunch box was missing and I had good suspicions on who might have taken it. I I don’t recall his name, but for the sake of this story, we’re going to call him Lex. Lex was a bad kid, a villain if you will. He was never nice to anyone. He didn’t share his toys or his comics. During recess, he would always pick fights- spitting spit wads at kids, pushing them around for their lunch money, and talking fertilizer wherever he went. And he’d always had a thing for me. The reasons were unknown. All I could think of was jealously.

The day my lunch box was stolen was probably one of traumatic days of my youth. It was my birthday and my parents had gotten me my first metal lunch box. I wanted to show and share it on our “Share and Tell” Fridays. Mrs. Wingett, my teacher had every student in her class share stories about their birthdays and what they have gotten. I had many Superman gifts from families and friends; one of things I was able to bring was my metal lunch box. I couldn’t bring the Nintendo or else I would. Later that day, when the final bell rang, everyone had gathered their backpacks and lunch boxes to go home, except me. As soon as I got to the door where all the things were kept, I noticed my lunch box was missing. Who would steal my “Man of Steel” lunch box, I thought??? I asked the teacher and she didn’t know.

While waiting for my parents to pick me up from school, I saw my lunch box from a distance. LEX!!!! I screamed as he ran away. My parents knew how much I loved that lunch box, so they called the school’s principle. And justice was done. Lex apologized and said he had found it after school somewhere. The battle against Lex was won, but the war and fueled ran on.

This post was written by:
stan

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C&D collective

 
We talk story on comicbooks, music, flicks and all the creative expressions that influence and inspire. Urban-nerds hailin from the SF Bay and Hawaii-- we rightfully scribe to represent our locales.

CONTRIBUTORS

Who am I Started this urban-nerd centric thang in 2009 and have since been reppin at filmfests, comiccons, local artspots, and everywhere else where real creative shit merge, intersect and explode. 

Thankfully, I have fellow imaginauts in this thang that augments my flow through their very different viewpoints but similar passion for things that go BOOM and POW both visually and mentally.  Like many of my fanboy-fam I ate up all things Marvel as a youth but have since grown up to become a hardcore DC-head.  There are no barriers to art and the many vehicles it chooses to travel through...oh, and I ain't your average ninja.
What I like * comicbooks * cosplay  *heroclix  * supporting global communities * cool design aspects * funny people * metahumans and mortals with an imagination that can create other worlds to live in and share
What I listen to * exaggerated enunciation * east coast rap roots * jazz influences * danceable beats * lyrics that tell a story * headphonic beats * radio friendly stylings * r&b samples * subtle use of pianos
What I read  *GL * Uncanny X-Force * Batman & Robin * Batman * Daredevil * FF *Secret Avengers * Batwoman * Birds of Prey *Wonderwoman * Booster Gold * JSA * Flash *JLI * Sirens of Gotham * Secret Six * Songs of Fire & Ice  *Haruki Murakami  *Charles Barkley  * Phil Jackson  *David Sedaris
Sex Power Move: Speed Force

Who am I: Trey. I am scared of heights, slow to open mail and have been asked if I am Chris Martin from Coldplay.

Wot I like: Oakland, Hondas, guacamole, 40s, sweatshirts

Wot I listen to: '60s/'70s soul, hip hop, freestyle, oldies, the occasional rock band

Wot I read: Cormac McCarthy, Kurt Vonnegut, books about football, film, soul and hip hop

Sex Power Move: Perception manipulation

Who am I Life time budget gamer (Since 1989). Long time internet addict (since 1995). Long time blogger (2001 represent). Grew up a slightly awkward tomboy and despite now dressing more like a woman these days, I never quite grew out of all my awkward tomboy ways.

What I like Video games, Mass Effect, Ghostbusters, comics, apocalyptic & post-apocalyptic fiction, sci-fi, zombies, design, lowbrow art, illustration, technology, horror, b-movies, music, fashion, food and  fitness.

What I listen to  Prince, James Brown, Michael Jackson, Peaches, Avenue D, OutKast, A Tribe Called Quest, The Beatles, Beastie Boys, Sia, The Rapture, Spank Rock, Thunderheist, Snoop Dogg, Kanye West, Yann Tiersen, Basement Jaxx.

What I read Anything Vonnegut, World War Z, The Walking Dead, Shopgirl

Sex Power Move are you they keymaster?




Who am I  My name is Bucky, straight from Kentucky. Actually it's Indiana, but that didn't rhyme. My good friend Omar invited me pontificate about all things comics in his lil' blog sandbox, so here I am. *doffs hat to Omar & JJ* Right off the bat, I am white and I don't have a clue what Dakine means. So there's that.

What I like Dolly Grips & Gaffers

What I listen to Everything

Sex Power Move: Invisible to technology, 3rd smartest man on the planet

Who Am I:  My name is Betty aka Darksithcupcake. I am a geek.

Wot I like: *Star Wars * video games * bake * travel * zombies * comics        * mid century chairs* art* food* vodka * high heels

Wot I listen to: *hip hop  * trance  * jazz  * dub  * bossa nova  

Wot I read: *Steinbeck* Hemingway* Faulkner

Sex Power Move: Hadouken

                     ALUMNI

Who am I I'm a melange of simple, random, complicated, loyal, genuine, observant, aloof & weird... I have multiple alias' & personalities (but they are under control, so don't fret, i'm not insane)... I like words, from simple to multi-syllabic, their meanings/synonyms/antonyms. One of my favorite websites is merriam-webster.com... big O recently got me back into the comic book game after a 15+ year hiatus. Thanks bro... I started collecting comic books in the mid-80's for about 10 years.

Back then comic books cost $0.60/book. When they started to cost $2.00/book I stopped. Coincidentally, this is the same time female relations were high on my social priority list... Back then, I only paid attention to the artwork in comic books with no regard to the story or writer. Now I feel that the writer/story is equally as important as the artwork... Tim & O, so it begins..oh and I am Co-Founder / Resident-Photographer

Wot I like * Comic Books * music * art * dance * sports * random references * humor * sarcasm * laughter * languages & culture * making my muscles burn & lungs explode * gummy bears * spinach * brussel sprouts * ramen * sashimi * uni * witty banter * well placed moles * imperfections - the perfect ones

Wot I listen to * hip hop (underground breakbeats / late 80's/early 90's) * 70's soul/r&b psychedelic soul classic rock * dance / electronic hard drum beats funky slap-happy bass lines * basically all kinds of sounds from the stripped down raw ones to complex productions

Wot I read * Chew * Sweet Tooth * Powers * Cowboy Ninja Viking * Deadpool * Invincible Iron Man * DareDevil * Vengeance of the Moon Knight * Ultimate X * Ultimate Avengers * The Ultimates * X-Force * Batman & Robin (Reborn) * Green Lantern/Blackest Night * The Flash * Secret Six * Jim Butcher - Dresden Files series * Rob Rogers - Devil's Cape * Brett Battles - Jonathan Quinn series * J.R.R. Tolkien - Lord of the Rings series * MC Foley - The Ice Hotel

Sex Power Move: Multiplicity

Who am I my bangs are straight. i have elf-ears that stick out. i am tiny and i like to wear hoodies and furry hats. i am a rad gamer, collect records, comic books and i make comics and adventures. i keep things in my pockets, such as pear jellybeans, macaroons, and sometimes a token. i mix up my metaphors. i snort when i laugh

Wot I like * causing mischief * deejaying with my bffs
* wii * gamers * graphic novels *new books *hot cocoa *making my own dance moves *kickin ass and takin names

Wot I listen to * old twang * tropicalia * soul* motown *blues * pop

Wot I read * anything by alan moore * grant morrison *brian k. vaughn * garth ennis * neil gaiman * banana yoshimoto and the list goes on...

Sex Power Move: up up down down left right left right B A start

Who am I  Started collecting at the age of 10 and never stopped. Throughout sports, marriage and career, I checked in periodically with Leifeld and Lee to favorites Madureira and Nord. Passion never died as stories and art continue to strive while Optimus, Hulk and more are brought to life on the big screen. O and I would rush home from school to catch Voltron, Snake Eyes and Panthro. All while grinding a fat bowl of Golden Grahams, shoes off and eyes wide open.

We hope to capture all things nostalgic, unseen, unheard, blown up, Hawaii, Sho Kosugi, deflected, laser blasted, mind tricked, dropped kicked, sword driven, gun toting, sexually charged, chi-harnessed, politically smart, musically gifted and fashionably updated. Once again it’s on!

Wot I like * Comics * writing * political essays * biographies * music * comedians * collaboration
* eureka moments * essays * health * fantasy sports * college football * mixed plates and poke'

Wot I listen to * Hip-Hop * Indie Pop * Hawaiian * Sludge Rock * Reggae * DJ Battles * 70 & 80's R&B * Classic Rock * Jazz * Acoustic Rock * Legends of Guitar

Sex Power Move: Growth Generation



  Who am I in the name of love and war took my shield and sword from the pit of the bottom, that knows no floor like the rain to the dirt, from the vine to the wine. from the alpha to creation, to the end of all time.

Wot I like * math *photography

Wot I listen to * sade adu

Wot I watch *wild combinations
Wot I read * intelligent investor

Sex Power Move: Tactile Telekinesis

Who am I:  I’m Batman! I fight crime. And I really hate the bad guys!
(chuckles) In the real world, I’m a modern day astronaut- supply,
repair, assemble, research and develop.  However, I hold Bill Clinton
responsible for directing the CIA to withhold payment for being the
star of something called "The Richest Family" during the presidency of
George H.W. Bush. My protests called for the impeachment of Clinton
even after Clinton was no longer in office. Bill Clinton and various
other US presidents are frequently accused of cooperating with the 12
Galaxies to commit crimes and treasons. -Sorry Frank Chu, I couldn’t
resist.

Wot I like:  Marvel, DC, Image, Pixar, Disney, Criterion Collection
and Palm Films. Dark Comedies, Sci-Fi, Action, Indie, and Foreign are
my favs. Baseball, Collegiate Sports, Football, Basketball, Golf,
Architecture, American Author, Poet, Naturalist, Tax resister,
Development Critic, Surveyor, Historian, Philosopher, Brilliant Minded
People, Personal Pan Pizzas , Symbolic Meanings, Business-to-Business,
Lovefest, History, Cultures, Sweets, Organic farming, Social Media
Networking, Beer, Spirits, Audi, Bootcamp, Yoga, Pilates, Ice cream,
Pizza, Burning Man, Coachella, Kayaking, Traveling, Bianchi Fixies,
and many many more…

Wot I listen to: Pandora and am dial.
Wot I read: Comics, what else could be better?  Maxim, please…

Sex Power Move: Austin Powers. Yeah, baby, yeah.

Who am I:  A proud graduate of Handsome Boy Modeling School and a known associate of Big O since drop kicking was in style. Old enough to remember that "Golden Era Hip Hop" was played either from a cassette a turntable or college radio show. That Must see TV was Transformer b/w G.I Joe on ch.2 @ 4. Learned hand checking, fouling and rebounding from watching the NY Knicks.  Still have the disgusting habit of buying cds from the record store, buying newspapers with nickles and dimes (cause they still don't accept pennies) and magazines from newsstands.


Wot I like: My Kidz, Hoops, B Ball Sneaks, Real Hip Hop,
Movies and TV Shows without Vampires...I'll take things that don't suck for 100 please. When I have time NBA LiveMadden and Resident Evil.
O yeah almost forgot Comics!!

Wot I watch:  The Midichlorian Count Saga, Royal Wid Cheese, The Dude Abides

Wot I listen to:  Too much to list but if you turn on the radio you wont find it.
Wot I read:  Anything by Elmore Leonard, Jim Swain, Don Winslow..basically anything with a gun..a dame..and a plan.

Sex Power Move: Sonic-scream

What I like: Ono grinds, anything –silog, analogies, wordplay, nostalgia, spongeboarding, cafes, philosophy, prose, soul searching, spinning vinyl, talking story...

Wot I watch: Departures, Planet B-Boy, Princess Kaiulani, Copyright Criminals, Dogtown and the Z-Boys, Scratch

Wot I listen to: Donny Hathaway (1945-1979), Jets to Brazil, Raashan Ahmad, DJ Jazzy Jeff, ♥ Jill Scott ♥, J Dilla, Cut Chemist, Red Hot Chili Peppers, freshkimos, Roc Raida, Elastica, BlackStar, Nina Simone, The CounterParts Crew, Jake Shimabukuro, Jazmine Sullivan, Pink Floyd, Foo Fighters, Jamie Foxx, Lyrics Born, DJ Enki, DJ Spair, Latyrx, Vienna Teng, Amad-Jamal, Slayers Club, Talib Kweli, Israel Kamakawiwo'ole, Skitz The Samurida, Mary J. Blige, Maxwell, Eluvium, A Tribe Called Quest, Sade Adu, Moriyama Naotaro, Weather Pending, Jazz Mafia, Nocturnal Sound Krew,FingerFaderFunk, Goh Nakamura, J-Live, Sublime, Lenny Kravitz, Kid Koala, Raphael Saadiq, Bonobo, A-Trak, Erykah Badu, Lauryn Hill, Stevie Wonder, Gorillaz, Kanye West, Jack Johnson, DJ Shadow, The Gift of Gab, GangStarr, Invisibl Skratch Piklz

Wot I read: Between the Deep Blue Sea and Me, Gaijin Yokozuna, Mercy Mercy Me, Eddie Would Go, Chinese Playground, Parable of Talents, Nufonia Must Fall, Last Night A DJ Saved My Life, Turntable Timmy

Sex Power Move: Unusual dexterity and teleportation with a faint scent of burning brimstone

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